Sadness ≠ Failure

Today in our series on sadness, the message for today is that you must remember that sadness is neither good nor bad. And that sadness certainly does not mean that you have failed or are failing at anything. Sadness is merely a part of a natural reaction to certain circumstances. So today let’s look at some ways to lead yourself through sadness:

  1. Allow yourself time. Sadness, like happiness, is part of life and like most great things in life … it takes time.
  2. My big one is, talk about it. Talk with those who you feel safe with. Bring up issues “happy” people like to ignore. Be real. Be honest.
  3. Focus on things within your control. There will be so many things in those first few weeks/months that you don’t feel like you can control. Let go of these things and focus on what you can control, the little things that will grow day by day.
  4. Believe your life does have a purpose, through the good and the bad, through the thick and the thin.
  5. Make sure to rest. I know for me keeping busy is the key and yet, sometimes, the message of sadness is to stop, or at least slow down and allow yourself time to feel and release the sadness
  6. Allow yourself to be sad. Cry if you need to. There are never too many tears. Remember that everyone gets sad at some point in their lives. Denying your feelings can force them inside where they do more damage with time.

Always remember, sadness does not mean failure. It does not take away from your awesomeness. It just is and you can work through these times and feelings of sadness.

Food for thought.

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Feeling Sad

Today, I have a question for you:Do you think that being happy means that we can never be sad?

My personal answer to this question is no. Sadness and happiness are like Ying and Yang. You need one to appreciate the other.

Earlier this year, a very close friend here in China lost her dad. And her journey with him through weeks of sickness, from diagnosis to death, bought back my own journey with my dad. Twelve years ago, we went through eight weeks of hell when my dad was diagnosed with a brain tumor. Four surgeries later, in just 8 weeks, he was gone from our lives.

The sadness, the heartbreak that we experienced, is indescribable. It’s like the world has just ended. It’s when your tears can’t fall and you feel nothing. You can’t cry, you can’t hear, you can’t speak, you can’t see. You just are.  And in that moment, your heart breaks.

With hindsight twelve years later, I am able to see how moving through that kind of indescribable sadness transforms a person. Having experienced that sadness really helps you appreciate life and appreciate happiness.

So today’s post is for all of you out there who have experienced sadness or are going through sadness now. And over the next three weeks we will look at sadness more in depth.

Our next blog shares with you things you can do to move through sadness. And remember, there is no alloted time for sadness and moving through it is always at your own speed.

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